The Peace Offering... I got bought Off!

Justin left last night and came back with this....

as his peace offering and to say sorry for being so mean. I guess he ended up not getting the Parade of Homes job because of licensing issues. He is really upset and I dont blame him! I feel bad I wasn't more understanding toward him. BUT It feels good to work through things and to understand the meaning behind his moods sometimes. I am just feeling so bad for him right now!

Nutcracker!

My little Ballerina! She was so exctied to meet the dancers. She wore her tutu all day long! Oh it was so fun seeing her light up around the pretty dancers and to have them all gawk at how cute she was!

My body Finally Gave into the Sickness...

After a week and a half of nursing my sick kiddos. I finally got the cold. I am so irriatated right now because no one seems to care that I am really sick! I didn't move off of the sofa yesterday, i had a horrible fever ...T BUT this has been the fisrt time I have really enjoyed our sectional. It is soooooo comfy. Anyway...today I passed out in the shower, completely blackout. It really freaked me out. I felt like I had just had a baby, my body aches and i am really weak. To top this all off Justin is working really hard to get ready for Christmas. He has got jobs to finish before we leave to go snowmobiling. So he is tired and irritable. Which I think it totally rude. He is never compassionate when I am ill. "You are just being a baby" he tells me. He gets upset that he has to fix dinner...or go get dinner is more like it. Like it is THAT inconvenient to stop at McD's on his way home. SO today he comes home with no food, he is pissy and being SO pleasent! I get yelled at for not fixing dinner and he stomps off (like a 2 yr old) to go buy HIMSELF food. What a selfish ****** I am not ammused by his immmaturatity. What pisses me off more is that I dont even have the energy to fight back so he just picks on me calling me names and I just lay there listening to his crap! I am so not in the mood for this, cant he just be nice I am sick and it is Christmas!

Taken by Kase

Christmas PJ's

This is the song I sang to Justin after I finished the PJ's..."I am a seeeeewer, I sewed these PJ's. I am like your moooother! You gotta love me!"

Yes I am very proud of these for one single reason...I made them!

"I don't like Santa!"

I am losing my mind...

I walked out of the Scrapbooking store with this little puppy. Walked all the way to my car and drove home. I carried it into the house before I realize what I had done!!!! So now it sits in my room on the floor because I am too ashamed to take it back and i feel too guilty to throw it away! What a nut I am :)!

"We can be together forever someday"

Yes that song is in my head. We just got back from the Forgotten Carols. Of course it was perfect, I bawled from begining to end. But as I was enjoying Micheal McLean, I thought back to last year. Last year this time, we went. Last year this time I was telling God I couldn't do this anymore. I couldn't be married to a man that didn't care. Last year I was praying for a change in him. THIS year, I see the change. I see a big change in but not just in him in US. That makes me so happy! Beyond Happy! Love my Hubby!

My weight this morning...

171!!!

Well I forgot that i need to weigh myself in the morning...I was 4 lbs lighter this morning! WOOHOOO! Makes me feel skinny! I have really sore muscle today but I worked out anyway, it felt sooo good! Then I mopped my floor, ooooo i feel even better!!! Kids are down for their naps...Kase is sick today and I am going to fold laundry. Yes I have a very eventfull day planned!

Justin and I are going on a date tonigh to Micheal McLeans Forgotten Carols...I am sooo excited!

Sick Bubba

Kase is Sick today. It started last night with a fever of 102! It has gone down but he is still not feeling good today. He asked me this morning if I could do him a favor...I said yes...he said will you sing me a song? Awww sweet little sick kid! Pray for him to get better!

I wondering if I am setting the kids up...

to be Molested. Now let me explain myself...

We are a very open family. We have always been comfortable being naked around the kids. We shower, we dress, we go the bathroom around them. I always wanted it to be that way, becuase being naked or talking about being naked or anything remotely to do with sex was so tabu in my house. I was 13 and still didn't know that my parents had sex...13 yrs and I had no clue! I feel like that got me into alot of trouble, I learned from other people. It was never explained to me other then IT IS BAD! I didn't want my kids feeling that way, and I didn't want them ever feeling like they couldn't ask me about certain personal things. I want to be able to talk to them about it, I want it to be no big deal.

Because we are so open about being naked, will they be comfortable being naked other places. Will that set them up to be molested. How do I talk to them about it being an "only at home thing" with out scaring them? I talked to Kase about strangers once and it freaked him out. He wouldn't even look at people at walmart because "they could steal him" I guess I dont know the words to say or how to say it.
I guess because of the things that happen in our family I am soo concerned that that evil will get us. I want to prevent it, I want to be aware of it. I just hope that I am not the one that starts it by us being too open.

I am being brave...

I started my new years resolution early this year...I MUST lose weight! I need to be treating myslef better. For me, the reason I am gain weight is I eat when I am insecure. I even think in my head these terrible little thoughts about how "I am going to get fat and Justin will leave me or cheat on me" I also crave sugar, I love cheesecake and oreo cookies. Ummm that just makes me hungry!

Well I have started exercising agian, right now I am doing Yoga and crunches 3 times a week. I will bumbed it up when I am ready. I have a gym membership so I will go to that also. (Do some weightlifting and Cardio)

The other big step is my eating. I decided to cut sugar out of my diet and white bread. Ahhhh! right now this part is killing me! I need to go get some no sugar snacks until my body refigures and is ok without the sugar. Oh man I miss it already!

I must stay strong...I must ! Sugar is fat, sugar is EVIL!

To start off my Journey I am going to post my weight and picture of myself...um I think at least!

So here goes!
Day 1 weight 175

(these are actually picture for a Scrap pg...the title will be battle scars, since I have a ton of stretch marks left over from my babies!

My Recent Artwork

I was too lazy to scan them in...so heres pics. Oh course they look better IRL!

WHOA!

I need to slow down, embrace the spirit of Christmas! I am doing too much, I am overdoing it. That is what I do best, overcommit myself! On my T0-DO list this week...
3 photoshoots, all of which need to be edited
5 Gingerbread houses to make, for out gingerbread party
Christmas cards to mail out
A house that needs a major cleaning
Scrapbook Pages...I need to get them done because they are all over my house!!!

Now that I have it all down it doesn't look like alot BUT there is all the other Housewife and Mommy stuff that has to take priority. So I am tring to squeaze as much as I can in while kids are napping or at night when everyone is sleeping!

So I am just trying to tell myself...SLOW DOWN!

New Decor

Justin has been busy making me all sorts of things for my house. I love that he is handy and creative. We make quite the pair, I dream up something he figures out how to make it for me! Oh how I love that man!

NOTE: Blogger wont let me upload photos tonight...i will have to try back tommarrow

New Header

Yep felt like it was time for a change. This picture was taken by my SIL, while we were in California. I love it, i have already had one printed and placed in a frame. It is rare when we can get a good photo of us together!

Saying Good Bye To My Girls

I taught my last lesson today in YW. It was an emotional lesson. I originally had planned on writing each girl a letter giving them each my last little words. But when the time came to finalize my lesson I couldn't remember what I was going to say to them all. At the end of the lesson I ended up telling each girl what they had taught me and what I hope the learned from me. I feel so close to my girls, personally I feel connected to them. I have shared so many personal stories from my life. My struggles, my weeknesses, my soul. I hope that they have learned something from me, I hope that I have been able to teach them SOMETHING. I feel so blessed to have had the opportunity to be with these amazing girls. I can't begin to explain the growth I have had from this calling.

Just one...

Story from sea world! We had a rocky start today, Kids are already pissy. Justin and I are not wanting to be around each other and to top it off we have to fight people through lines at sea world. Great day!

Well we wait 1 hour to get into Shamu and we get great seats. Right in the splash zone...front and center. Kase comments on how he needs to go pee, he can hold it. 5 sec later he is wiggling and screaming. "I have to go PEEEEEEEE." No you don't! Well after a couple of mins of whinning, we both realize that he really has to go. By this time it is too late, if Justin takes him out he is going to miss the show. So Justin says...

"Kase just pee," "he is just going to get wet anyway!"

Yep you know the rest...he pees in his pants. Oh but it gets better, at lunch he jumps up and pees agian. Poor kid thinks that it is ok to pee in his pants, it couldnt get any better!!

Day 3

Happy Thanksgiving!

Yep we spent Thanksgiving in Disneyland. It was sooooo busy, there where people everywhere! But my SIL took the kids for 4 hours and let Justin and I go on some rides together. What a brave soul, the last day of disneyland with kids that hadn't napped or sleep nearly long enough. They were terrible for her and I am so thankful that she had them. Our favorite ride we went on was Indiana Jones...ohh I loved it. The line was hours and hours long...good thing we got fast passes!

We actully had turkey dinner at the park, they had turkey legs there! Yep turkey dinner in the park, it was great!!! We watched the fireworks and ate our dinner.

Disneyland was all and more then I had expected. The feeling there is amazing. Watching the kids met their heros was priceless. I am so glad we were able to take this trip as a family. This will be unforgetable.